[ExI] Avoiding Coarseness in our Dialogs

[BillK]

On 5/7/07, Lee Corbin wrote:
> I have never heard this mechanism suggested before. Is it original
> with you, or can you recall where you first encountered it?
>
> It would be utterly amazing (in my eyes) if the proper role of
> profanity---or one of its entirely unobjectionable roles---is to
> forestall or replace violence.
>


I doubt if it is original with me.
(Although I understand that just making stuff up is a legitimate
debating tactic)  :)

I don't know where I got the idea from, probably read it somewhere, so
fire up some search engines and let's see.....

Apparently the man you want to read is Professor Timothy Jay, PhD,
Department of Psychology, Massachusetts College of Liberal Arts.
<http://www.mcla.edu/Academics/Majors__Departments/Psychology/tjay/tjay.php>
He has written several books on the subject.

Quote:
According to Dr. Timothy Jay, a psychologist and author of books on
swearing, including "Cursing in America" and "Why We Curse," trashy
talking is a basic human impulse. "This language fulfills emotional
needs on two levels: my need, as a speaker, to cope with some emotion,
like fear or surprise, and it conveys that feeling very effectively to
someone else." In fact, says Jay, it can be a social safety valve: "It
allows us to express our emotions without physicality….Once you can
tell people 'I hate you,' you no longer have to put yourself in
jeopardy to prove it."

Quote:
 Regardless of who is cursing or what the provocation may be, Dr. Jay
said, the rationale for the eruption is often the same.
"Time and again, people have told me that cursing is a coping
mechanism for them, a way of reducing stress," he said in a telephone
interview. "It's a form of anger management that is often
underappreciated."

Quote:
Such behaviors are threat gestures, Professor de Waal said, and they
are all a good sign.
"A chimpanzee who is really gearing up for a fight doesn't waste time
with gestures, but just goes ahead and attacks," he added.
By the same token, he said, nothing is more deadly than a person who
is too enraged for expletives - who cleanly and quietly picks up a gun
and starts shooting.



BillK