[ExI] Privacy

BillK pharos at gmail.com
Mon May 21 18:29:26 UTC 2018

The new EU GDPR privacy legislation is shortly coming into force and
UK folk are being flooded with emails from every company they have
ever contacted as companies attempt to explain how they are misusing
customers' data.

I liked the following from 'The Daily Mash' --


Dear User / Barely Sentient Marketing Target,

Some time ago you allowed us access to every aspect of your life.
Don’t deny it. You know you tick any box going and never read the
accompanying text about companies’ plans to ruthlessly exploit you
because it’s boring.

And now, in light of a new data privacy law coming in across the EU,
we are legally required to tell you that we’ve got your data, we’ve
sold your data, and we will be continuing to do whatever the f**k we
like with it.

We know everything about you. How your marriage is doing. Which of the
kids is your favourite. That little phase of ‘exploring your
sexuality’ in 2003. And it’s all for sale to the highest bidder.

If your friends want to know which of them you truly like, we’ll tell
them. If businesses want to know exactly when on a Friday night you
hit your lowest, drunkest, most-vulnerable-to-shoe-advertising point,
we’ll tell them as well.

Please don’t imagine we find you interesting. It’s just that the
tedious grind of your mundanity – seriously, you’re reading the
Wikipedia entry for Donnie Darko again? That’s the sixth time in ten
years – makes us money.

If someone wants to sell you something, whether it’s jeans, gym
membership or Brexit, they come to us. Then we tell them how to do it
because you are no more complex than a cow.

So we’re keeping your data. We’re collecting more data. That
slack-jawed expression you’ve got, reading this? We’ve recorded it via
your webcam just in case anyone, anywhere, one day finds it useful.

Now delete this email and stop thinking about it forever. Done? Thanks.

All the best,
The Daily Mash




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