[ExI] no good deed goes unpunished

[spike at rainier66.com]

No particular significance, only a word to the wise: don't do it.

 

I filled my chariot with petroleum, decided to use their automated
drive-thru car wash.  Got in line, four cars ahead of me.  A yahoo pulled in
there a little too far.  The machine suggests BACK UP waits two seconds BACK
UP two seconds  BACK UP...  

 

The fool sat there doing nothing, while the machine flatly refused to start
up, with the Detroit product too far forward, the machine "knowing" it can't
get around front with its whirly brushes to the front of the car.  I will
not do the job wrong, it will opt to do nothing until the goofball carries
out its insistent suggestion: so BACK UP.

 

The human operator sat there for about two minutes doing nothing at all,
during which I made a Yoda-like observation, slightly modified:  The Dumb is
strong in this one.

 

A possible explanation: the operator was profoundly deaf.  There is no law
against driving deaf, or even stupid for that matter, so long as the latter
affliction is not so severe as to prevent passing a simple written test at
the DMV.

 

Then I saw the backup lights come on.  But the brake lights never went off,
and of course there was no motion nor change in the attitude of the
insistent carwash machine.  Another minute went by before I concluded it was
time for a prole to see if he could help.  I got out, walked up to the
driver, who I noted was female, with headwear from the Middle East.  I
smiled and motioned toward the stern.  She could see I meant to assist.  She
THEN let off a little on the brake, and her ride drifted back about a foot,
at which time, the carwash machine was satisfied it could do its job,
cheerfully and enthusiastically went into its pre-wash cycle.

 

With this sudden and startling development, I made a hasty egress, a bit
wetter and soapier than I had anticipated perhaps, under the amused gaze of
three other drivers who witnessed the Three Stooges routine with the other
two missing, at which time I had the option of standing out there until I
dried or getting back into my own conveyance, on my leather seats.

 

Sigh.

 

In any case, if you are one who amuses yourself with New of the Weird, and
see a story from the point of view of the three carwash customers ahead of
me plus two others who had pulled in behind, you will know the likely origin
of the incident.  On a lighter note, I did manage to escape the whirly
brushes, for had those managed to trap me in there, a bad day could have
become far worse (YAAAAAAH Boom (Hey what happened to that skinny geezer, he
was just there a few seconds ago.))

 

If you read Arabic and they have a site called Infidels Are Soooo Stupid,
you will know who is that hapless prole who only wanted to help, resulting
in slippery consequences.

 

spike

 

 

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