[ExI] let's sue us

[spike at rainier66.com]

I am reading about a lawsuit in the US where social media are being sued for being addictive and harmful to the addict of social media.  The defendants are YouTube, Meta (which is Face Book (I think)) Snap and Tik Tok.  Snap already settled, so they are out of the lawsuit lottery now.  One can imagine Yank companies YouTube and Face Book to follow, settling out of court for an undisclosed buck thirty seven, leaving the Chinese owned Tik Tok holding the bag, where an American jury will potentially award one hundred biilllllllion dollars to the addicted plaintiff.

 



 

OK cool, that gives me an idea: let’s sue us.  I have been an ExI addict for well over 30 years, face down in the gutter, wallowing helplessly in my own barf and urine, pathetic.  

 

Well, OK that is a bit of an exaggeration, but there is interesting stuff posted here, and I am the victim, I tells ya!  Granted I am also the perpetrator.  So I had an idea.  Let us sue ourselves.  The collective defendants will pay the penalty in direct proportion to that defendant’s number of posts (since that is an objective criterion) and will collect in direct proportion to that defendant’s number of posts.  Of course that leaves out the lurkers who may be hopelessly addicted to us but never post, for they don’t get to pay themselves vast sums as we hardcore addicts will be compelled to do.

 

I volunteer to be our legal representative for both the prosecution and the defense.  Since the judge will dismiss any case with this level of absurdity, I will assume that outcome and volunteer to arrange we settle with ourselves out of court, for any amount you can afford to pay yourself.  Since I am both a defendant and a plaintiff, I gave myself 100 billion dollars.

 

I don’t quite know what to make of that notion of suing a platform for being addictive.  It feels to me like suing McDonalds ore Krispy Kreme for making one flabby.  Are their products addictive?  Are they harmful, particularly if over-devoured?  Well, ja, to both questions.  Is it illegal to make one’s own product enticing?  No.  If one is in charge of either of those examples, or any other company that makes good stuff, that is the reason you exist.

 

And why did TwitterX get left out of that defendant list?  That platform is more addictive than any of the four named, two of which I have never used.

 

In any case, to all my ExI co-defendants and co-plaintiffs, congratulations and condolences on your penalty/award.

 

spike    

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