[Paleopsych] marriage

[Michael Christopher]

Christian says:
>>What about the idea that marriage is now more of 
an option instead of an obligation and that drives the
rates lower by increasing the selective criteria for a
lifelong partner including the criteria of love?<<

--I think that's true. Those who marry young may lack
the self-esteem to be more selective, and get divorced
later on when they regain their confidence, build a
career, etc. If circumstances change to the point
where one's self image is changed, previous decisions
made in a less confident state of mind are
re-evaluated. As long as people marry young due to
lack of experience or low self-esteem, of course
they're going to get divorced, no matter how much
guilt you pile on them for it. Guilt also comes from
being married without love, having to fake it, and
eventually the guilt of staying overrides the guilt of
leaving. On the other hand, people are exposed to a
mass media fantasy life that tells them, "you can be
anything" and there isn't much preparation for married
life when the infatuation phase is over. Nor does
anyone seem to know how to become re-infatuated and
experience the authenticity of genuine, flowing
emotion with someone they know too well. 

Michael


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