[extropy-chat] christmas music

David Lubkin extropy at unreasonable.com
Fri Dec 12 15:02:44 UTC 2003


At 09:48 PM 12/11/2003 -0800, Spike wrote:

>I do not have an extropic answer to this problem:
>around christmas, all you hear is christmas music,
>for a two solid months, from just before Halloween
>until just after New Years, and it drives me CRAZY.

There are two facets to your problem.  The first is that we need our own 
set of Newtonmas songs as a counter-offense to drive THEM crazy.  We do, 
after a fashion.

The primary liturgy is that of the not-late, great Tom Lehrer.  His psalms 
were taught to my parents as young postulants in the Gomorrah of Cambridge, 
who taught them to me, as I then taught them to my daughter -- an unbroken 
chain of meme propagation to carry them to the Singularity.

Immerse yourself in the simple grace of the parable of The Masochism Tango 
and of the credo "Don't write naughty words on walls if you can't spell."

In Lehrer's wake, we have the lesser profits of Monty and the Pythons and 
more-recent candidates for canonization (in full support of Second 
Amendment rights).

>The real problem is that there aren't enough different
>songs, so they play the saaaammme ooooonnnnes
>over and over and over and over and every yahoo has a
>slightly different version of the same old thing.  But
>the real problem is that in the shopping malls, they
>have instrumental versions, and you can't help
>thinking the words!  Just try: you can't do it.
>Try to not think of the words to Jingle Bells next
>time you hear it, and good luck.

This is the second facet.  Young Jedi, you must learn the power of the filk 
if you are to shield yourself from the Empire's death rays:

Deck us all with Boston Charlie
Walla Walla Wash and Kalamazoo
Nora's freezing on the trolley
Swaller dollar cauliflower allergaroo
Don we now archaic barrels,
Hula Boola Pensa Cola, Louisville Lou
Molly Prolly don't love Harold
Walla Walla Wash and Kalamazoo


-- David Lubkin.





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