[extropy-chat] Effective relationships and self identity

[Jef Allbright]

david ish shalom wrote: 

> Jef Allbright"  wrote:  
>> Might it be that the most effective 
>> relationship structure in terms of cost/benefit might be the triad? 
>> I'm not talking about polyamory or mriage ? trois but rather a 
>> stable, committed triadic relationship between three individuals 
>> in any combination of genders.
>	
> Amazing what you say Jef, i am married to an Indian woman, I love 
> here,a few months ago i came to live in Israel and have new lover, 
> my wife is supposed to come soon to live with me, and i intend and 
> hope to maintain a trio, which i "naturally" there are some personal 
> and social difficulties,  especially in conservative Jerusalem, yet 
> some personal advantages, but your claim is encouraging, will you 
> elaborate please ? 

David, when I suggested that triadic relationships might provide
inherent advantages, I hinted (strongly, I thought), but did not make
fully make explicit, that I thought this form might rise to predominance
within a more highly developed (and more highly competitive) culture
with individuals possessing a higher degree of awareness than the
present situation. 

As Keith Henson mentioned, evolutionary psychology provides a good basis
for understanding much of the dynamics of human relationships at the
individual and group level. There are strong reasons why such
relationships are not stable within the social context.  [Note to Keith:
I studied Cosmidies and Toobey and others several years ago, but thanks
anyway for the suggestion.  ;-)]

In your particular case, I wish you luck maintaining your
relationship(s).  Perhaps you and your partners should read Heinlein for
inspiration.  Note that a high degree of openess and honesty is
recommended, but rarely achieved over the course.


> secondly to the issue of self identity:  who wrote this text about 
> Alice changing life? i find it very illuminating to the issue of 
> huge changes in the self  connectedness  component, yet keeping the 
> self  identity intact to the effect that young Alice survive in old 
> Alice, which strongly support our ability to capture the identity 
> critical information now, while our attention is mainly diverted to 
> our self transformation content. i will with your permission 
> integrate that text in my website
http://davidishalom1.googlepages.com/home 

I wrote that little series of vignettes to highlight an internal
contradiction in a certain mode of thinking about self-identity, and to
prepare the way for a more encompassing understanding that provides a
coherent basis for thinking about new personal freedoms and new issues
of moral and legal responsibility with the arrival of radical new
technological capabilities.  Since this project is not yet complete, it
might be best if you hold off on quoting the first part of my argument
since you may not agree with the next part.

In general, I support your right to refer to my writing or anyone else's
writing on the web as long as authorship and original context remain
clearly intact. 

- Jef