[ExI] anger

[William Flynn Wallace]

I think frustration works better than anger for motivation.  Anger too
often leads to irrational thoughts and actions.  Certainly harming my
family would make me angry, which might then lead to retaliation and even
shooting someone. I have thought very seriously about killing a couple of
doctors. That's why we have cops and courts.  You CAN be angry without
acting recklessly - it's just difficult for some people, me included.  My
wife dealt with ATand T.  I knew what I would do: start screaming at the
person in customer service.

Twenty years ago a man appeared at my door - a next door neighbor whom I
had not met.  Very large person - angry.  Told me that if my dogs did not
stay out of my garden he would shoot them.  Whereupon I told him that if he
did that I would burn his house down.  I was pretty steamed.  He backed off
immediately and left.  (Thanks to him for not bending me into a pretzel).
Ten minutes later a deputy sheriff showed up and we had a talk.  I told him
that I should not have said that; that I would never do that; that I would
pay for his damage, and so on.  Could I have handled that better in the
first place?  Of course.  But see what anger did.  It took a rather
intelligent, rational person - me - and reduced him to petty threats.  I
vowed never to react that way again, though it might be a hard promise to
keep if someone harms any of my family, including my pets.

I have had to work on my temper all my life.  Those whose angers are not as
strong as mine might find them easier to control.  I am quick on the
trigger.

Anger does have its good points.  But the negative ones far outweigh the
positives, for me.

bill w

On Wed, Sep 23, 2020 at 2:47 PM Dave Sill via extropy-chat <
extropy-chat at lists.extropy.org> wrote:

> On Wed, Sep 23, 2020 at 3:09 PM William Flynn Wallace via extropy-chat <
> extropy-chat at lists.extropy.org> wrote:
>
>> The way to handle anger:  forgiveness.  Forgive yourself for perhaps
>> overreacting.  Forgive whoever made you angry whatever the reason (why?
>> grudges only hurt you)  Acting out your anger only makes it worse.  Freud
>> was wrong.  The Greeks too.
>>
>
> Somebody shoots your dog, rapes your daughter, or lynches your son and
> forgiveness is the only recourse?
>
> Act out your anger and what does it get you?
>>
>
> You can be angry without reacting recklessly.
>
>   For some it has produced feuds lasting hundreds of years between
>> Scottish clans.  Look at the Arabs and Jews.  You can never really get
>> even.  ATand T has screwed me more than once.  What should I do?  Go out
>> and pull some of their cables down?
>>
>
> Maybe switch to a different phone provider?
>
> We don't need anger.
>>
>
> I disagree. Some things *should* make you angry, and that anger should
> motivate you to do something to redress the wrong or prevent it from
> happening again.
>
> -Dave
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