[Paleopsych] Christian Church Bulletin Bloopers

[Premise Checker]

The Fasting and Prayer Conference includes meals.

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water." The sermon to night: 
"Searching for Jesus."

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the 
recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those 
things not worth keeping around the house. Don't forget your husbands.

The peacemaking meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a 
conflict.

Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at 
someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much 
about you.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help.

Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again," giving obvious 
pleasure to the congregation.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery 
downstairs.


Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help 
they can get.

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more 
transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of 
Pastor Jack's sermons.

The Rector will preach his farewell message after which the choir will 
sing: "Break Forth Into Joy."

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. 
So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall. Music 
will follow.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What Is Hell?" 
Come early and listen to our choir practice.


Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several 
new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. 
Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person 
you want remembered.

The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and 
gracious hostility.

Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow.

The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be 
seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from 
the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are 
invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B.S. is done.

The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would 
lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the 
back door.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the Church 
basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this 
tragedy.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan 
last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours

Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church. Please 
use large double door at the side entrance.